How to Harness the Courage Required to Express Your Magic
“If she's not healed her Witch Wound (that deep seated fear of being her full self-expression), then no matter how hard she trains in magical modalities, it's unlikely that she will ever have the courage to bring that medicine to the world fully and completely.”
~ Nicole Barton
Oh my god has my Secret Witch been having meltdowns this week over where my business is going.
Like, seriously - those intense, emotional witchy meltdowns I was talking about? Yep, those. I've been consciously leaning into a powerful choice to SLOW the hell down, which my Secret Witch hates because she's scared of getting bored, missing out and also terrified of creating joy (which is the last thing you'd think, but as I've been banging on about for a few weeks, Witches feel much safer in the darkness!).
So, when my soul told me it was time to chose to intentionally delay my crucible until the New Year, reduce my 1:1 work by a third, whilst simultaneously hiring two new team members and creating space to focus on getting crystal clear clarity on the Wild / Witch Apothecary (name TBC!) philosophy and model so that I could birth it into the world with the unapologetically magical potency it truly deserves, my Secret Witch (who forgets her power and magic) was like
She was saying "but you've already got a business model and brand, why don't you stick with it?," "shouldn't you be selling more courses, instead, when you already had people enrolled?!," "hurry up and just do it", "if you delay that crucible, you can't start the next one on time," "are you crazy, this is a huge vision?" and of course, the classic - "this is going to cost you money".
These are #allthefears that have my Phosphoric Witch (who embodies her fiery power and magic) meeting her edge and holding the tension - over, and over again - all in the name of truly becoming the medicine my soul came here to be.
And this is why I know that this journey is NOT easy. It requires ridiculously deep courage, holding of the fear - and, mostly, the deepest of BURNING, heart-led longings (because, well, if you don't have that, fear will be the stronger, winning force).
I was thinking this morning about how I'd not really seen quite how courageous I've been in walking this path at times, and I realised with deep gratitude, that this is because my parents modelled to me that devotion and courage in entrepreneurship was normal. They'd burn down one business overnight and invest £100k rebuilding it the next, to be more in alignment.
I hadn't appreciated, until I saw that, how Witchy my Mum truly is - and it filled my heart with deep love that she'd so graciously modelled the deep courage required to create what's in your heart. That doesn't mean I find it easier, though - in fact, at times I can find it terrifying, because I've seen risks being taken, over and over, and my shadow has made stories of that. But it does mean that risk became ordinary, normal and the most obvious thing to do, if something was aligned.
And still, it is scary, and takes deep courage to walk the path that is truly yours. And I see that - for the Witch, especially - it is like a double eged sword to become her medicine.
Because, firstly, there's having the courage to build a business - and that's one thing that anyone struggles with. But, for a Witch, whose business will likely be entirely an expression of who she is (after all, she's the Remedy, that will be medicine for all the women who are here for her healing) - well, this is where the second helping of fear (and courage) comes in.
Here's the thing: if she's not healed her Witch Wound (that deep seated fear of being her full self-expression), then no matter how hard she trains in magical modalities, it's unlikely that she will ever have the courage to bring that medicine to the world fully and completely.
And this is the exact reason I'm taking the risks I'm taking - because it takes deep courage to live fully as the full expression of your soul - and especially to birth that as a business. This is the very catalyst of the path. I've literally been born here to serve all those magical women with burning fires in their bellies to become their remedy in the world - and the path of Wild / Witch Apothecary is one of helping them learn to become their unapologetically magical selves, discover their unique remedy and become it in the world.
And so, I'm leaning in, because I know it starts with me. I'm also celebrating two business milestones this week, so terrifying as is, I also know it's worth it.
I'm seeing, more and more, that because there's a double helping of courage required, the path I'm creating won't be for everyone. It will only be for a certain type of woman - a fiery, intense woman with that burning desire, a twinkle in her eye and a knowing in her heart that she's HERE for more than the muggle life she's been creating so far. (And, as much as part of me hates to admit this , it's likely she'll be an intense one who has similar meltdowns to me when her shadow creeps in! )
I'm here for it all - if you are.
It's likely you'll know its for you by the initiations you've been calling in to test your courage and devotion. If you've been having meltdowns over everything you're trying to do to create your healing business going wrong (I've seen the Witch actually needs challenge, this week too), or if it's feeling too painful to just even simply be seen and loved for being yourself (I hear you), then it is likely - if you've still got that fire - that the path we're creating at Team Secret Witch could be for you.
We'll be soon unveiling a 'Secret (Witch) Society' of sorts, for those women who are *really*, truly here for the journey, and are truly ready to learn how to harness the Wild / Witch Apothecary to heal themselves, discover their remedy and dose it into the world.
If you'd like to keep up to date with what we create, join our Secret Witch Circle sisterhood and more will be revealed as we journey.
I'll see you there - if you're fiery enough. 💖
if you've any questions, send me an email.
Nicole x
