How the Feminine Calls to You to Reclaim your Feminine Mystery
"Because I'd not claimed my Feminine power during the various precious initiations I'd been invited into along my path, I'd entered unconsciously - without really considering what it meant to be a woman"
~ Nicole Barton
Mothers' Day a few days ago had me reflecting on how when I became a Mama to my beautiful Lily, I had absolutely no idea that it was going to be the transformational portal it was into the death to old parts of me and an initiation into me reclaiming my power.
Certainly during my traumatic birth it didn't feel like that at all. I had an awful birth, and ended up with a paralysed face and a wounded body. I was tense and untrusting of my body's wisdom. Thankfully, Lily was absolutely happy and healthy, for which I am blessed and appreciative.
As it turns out, my trauma, my wounds - and giving Birth - were all a hugely profound portal for me to begin to reclaim who I really was - in all my Majesty. Until I gave birth I had always doubted my power, doubted my wildness, and I was using my magic unconsciously in ways that just weren't having me create what I desired. I felt powerless and like a scared little girl with no say over her life - a good girl, stuck in a life she'd not really wanted.
What I have come to know is that this was because I'd not claimed my Feminine power during the various precious initiations I'd been invited into along my path, and instead, I'd entered unconsciously, without really considering what it meant to be a woman, and the beauty available to us as we open and soften into our power from love.
In fact, I'd actually shamed many of my Feminine initiations (first bleed and menstruation) and suffered many womb symptoms. I began to see more recently that this shame and the lack of initiation into my power at each stage of Feminine expansion was stopping me from being fully in my radiance, my body's wisdom and my heart - my magnificence. I hadn't moved through Maiden and Lover into Mother and Queen.
I've seen this pattern in my women too, the pattern that their various Feminine portals of initiation are often ignored, shamed and feared, leading to them staying stuck in inner child mode, often rejecting the Feminine body's wisdom entirely, rather than lovingly choosing into their Sovereign Feminine power and magic.
They can struggle, like I did, at each initiatory stage of the Feminine - this showing up at the various phases of their lives, as period pains and imbalances like endometriosis, as traumatic births, and as shame around all aspects of their Femininity. All of which are about a lack of feeling safe in the Feminine body and power. About them shaming their body's witchy Truth, instead of harnessing the power held in its very cells; in the Creative cauldron of their wombs.
And so, something is birthing within me - another crucible - for later this year, as I witness the power available for my women in reclaiming their feminine magic. In re-initiating themselves into the magic of their Feminine Mystery so they can be the loving power they came here to be.
Last night, on Mothers' Day in the UK, I energetically birthed this crucible into the world with a rose oil and rose petal filled bath, my favourite "Voice of My Womb" music by Marya Stark and candlelit intention setting for this special crucible. All the Feminine beauty. I'll be sharing it with the wild next, to magically call in those few magical women deeply aligned for the journey.
This crucible will be later in the year, so if this stirs something in you and you've not journeyed with me before, for now I'd recommend beginning with Wild Creatrix in April as your first tender steps into discovering your Feminine power. If you're feeling the call to what's birthing, it will be an intimate crucible with only 8 spaces, so message me and I'll let you know first when enrolment is opening.
Do you have a deep reverence for the Feminine power and mystery that you are, or is it time to begin to connect deeper with your body, Soul and heart to begin to reclaim it?
Much love
Nicole x
