Why Thinking You're Not Ready to Embrace Soul, Self-love and Magic Paradoxically Could Mean You Are
“That's what this path is all about- learning to love yourself enough to be able to tend these fears and choose your Soul, choose your magic and choose to create life in ways that are in deep alignment for you. And all of it is a choice.”
~ Nicole Barton
Paradoxically, all the fears that have the Secret Witch (who doesn't know her own power and magic) lean away from deepening into the path are #alltheways that it will benefit her in the long run. The first hurdle is usually that my magical women think they're just not even good enough to participate - and from that belief they immediately discount that it is even a possibility for them to begin to live from Soul and create a life they love. And bless your heart if that's you - I have been there, and I so know that feeling of not being worthy of magic. And yet, paradoxically, when walking the path, she discovers that this isn't true, and it filters out into all of life. If they even get to the stage of reaching out with intrigue, the second most common fear I hear in magical women choosing in, is the belief they they "haven't got enough time or energy".
The Secret Witch usually spends her life running around after everyone else - selling her Soul for approval, security and control, instead of allowing her heart to lead. To this woman, magic sounds like an luxury, instead of the paradoxical truth that harnessing their magic is what has my women *create* more time and energy, in a really beautiful way - the way of self love and of conscious, feminine creation, rather than the burden of being busy. The path frees up so much energy and time.
This is linked into the fear that investing her energy in herself is indulgent. There's a big fear in my magical women that they won't be approved of because they are being "selfish" and "should be serving others". This again, is a deep sign that she needs to lean into liberating this fear with love, and allow her heart to begin to lead. And linked into all of this, another fear is that "now isn't the right time." This one can be true, now and then, and often takes a bit of guidance to ascertain whether this is coming from fear or not. But often it is - and often the magical one who puts this objection in the way of herself creating a life she loves is because there's a deeper, unseen fear at play - largely a fear of actually being in her magnificent power, and what reclaiming it might mean for her.
Paradoxically, again, this woman needs to know she already has power; she's just been using it unconsciously to create what she doesn't want - and choosing out for this reason is the same unconscious (and therefore innocent) pattern. A pattern that choosing in would help her liberate. And money; the investment is always an edge for my Secret Witches - and I've known this fear well myself. She doesn't believe she's worthy, and she also can't see the possibility for how she can create enough money to pay for what she's invested in herself. She perhaps can't even comprehend that it's not a choice between waking the path of Soul and having money. Paradoxically, this is the very thing she's here to learn in walking the path: how to create all her heart's desires - including abundance.
Another deep fear is that the magical ones drawn to Creatrix feel they don't know enough about being a witch, or enough about magic - they feel too much of a beginner to dive in. Owning herself as a Creatrix feels edgy. Again, the resonance shows that there's something drawing this magical one in, and what she needs is that first initiation - to take those tender first steps by actually choosing to learn more about her Creatrix, to let herself be a beginner and love herself where she is. And so, usually, most of the objections my women have to beginning to walk the path - and all the ways they reject it - are really all the ways they reject loving themselves. They are just deep calls for love, that their hearts often swells for, and their head argues with them about. And again, that's what this path is all about; learning to love yourself enough to be able to tend these fears and choose your Soul, choose your magic and choose to create life in ways that are in deep alignment for you. And all of it is a choice. Just largely, it's an unconscious one, based on the paradoxical fears that keep you where you are, instead of taking the next courageous step.
We will be diving into all of this in Invoke Your Wild Creatrix. And if you're discounting it for any of these reasons, it might be time to peel back the layers a little deeper and explore which parts of you are crying to be loved, heard and held. And if you can do that, then know this: you've all the power required to join us. If you'd like my help I'm offering exploration calls, so reach out and I'm here to hold you as you choose from the heart.
Much love
Nicole x
